Top 10 Funny Tweets!

@adamisacson Anyone want to join my liberal militia? No guns or anything -- we just go out in the woods and feel guilty about stuff. It's fun.

@Crowe-Jam Re-distribution of the wealth doesn't sound so bad. But this distribution of the poverty is killin' me.

@tehawesome If Twitter icons have taught me anything it's that the male eye can spot cleavage at incredibly low resolutions.

@ConanOBrien Today I got my 1,000,000th Twitter follower! I am now in the realm of Gods like Ashton, Bieber, Mariah, and updates on new Dell products.

@Brain_Walsh Horrific oil spill, hurricane coming behind it, plague of frogs, economic collapse. All the girls who said, "last guy on Earth", get ready.

@lafix As I wait for the elevator, the two men also waiting have begun speaking German.This is how porn starts, people.

@OverlandParker The a/c in my office isn't working and has now officially become accepted as one of us.

@bonisteel BREAKING: U.S. may return suspected spies in deal that would see Russia admit Roger Moore was Best Bond Ever.

@badbanana Have to say, I absolutely nailed the part in my hair today. Pretty sure everyone noticed. Hope a few went home inspired.

@BettyLies I'm thinking of re-releasing my old tweets in 3D.